Woman Please: Cut The Safety Guy Loose

Woman, please.  The idea of a Safety Guy is pretty evil.

Oh, you know the guy I’m talking about; that guy that you let take you out on dates, that buys you flowers “just because,” that is clearly falling in love with you, but that you’re just not THAT into.

You know him as your Safety Guy.  He’s handsome, but not overly hot; financially independent, but not rich; funny, but not Louis C.K.-funny (I love Louis C.K.).  And if all else fails with the hottie lawyer, doctor, PR guru, or insert-power-job-here, at least you’ll have Safety Guy to fall back on, right?  No, you’ll never have to worry about being alone, thanks to Safety Guy!

I used to date a girl who had a Safety Guy.  I was managing a bar in Spain and she was teaching English.  Safety Guy was one of her students who had a HUGE crush on her – he brought her flowers to every private tutoring session, bought her dinner, invited her to “go for a walk along the river” while she tutored him, etc.  And after each lesson, she’d come over to my place and I’d screw her silly.  Poor, poor Safety Guy…

Yes, the cliché of “He’s Just Not That into You,” also exists for women (this issue was also recently addressed on the TV show, “How I Met Your Mother,” referred to as, “keeping someone on the hook”).  Men will date a girl just to meet their physical needs (read: sex), but most men will at least be honest if you ask them, “Hey, is this just sex?”  Somehow, I feel the way women treat Safety Guy is a little more evil…   Believe it or not, Safety Guy has feelings, too (Prick him, does he not bleed?).  Am I the only one who thinks using someone emotionally could potentially be more dangerous than using someone physically?

Ladies, if you don’t see a future with a man, fine – then stop seeing him.  I think after two or three dates, if you know that it’s not going anywhere, either stop seeing the guy, or let him know, “Hey – this is fun, but I don’t see a future here.”  It’s not right to string Safety Guy along, keeping him at arm’s length, but not letting him move on with his life, either.  So, Woman, Please – let Safety Guy go and find a woman that is actually as into him as he is into her.

This column is written anonymously by dudes for dudes and ladies too. Questions and comments to Woman Please can be sent by email to womanplease@gmail.com on Twitter at @woman_please or on our Facebook page at Woman Please.

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Tags: dating, dating advice, dating advice from men, Saftey guy

This entry was posted on March 10, 2010 at 2:34 pm and is filed under Twin Cities. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.